cowpat.

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Monday, October 26, 2009

All this feel strange and untrue
and I won't waste a minute without you
My bones ache, my skin feels cold
and I'm getting so tired and so old

Brites/Shadowers;
if only life was that simple.

Get up, get out, get away from these liars
'cause they don't get your soul or your fire
Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine
And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time

Tell me that you''ll open your eyes

14:14
cowpat.

Thursday, October 08, 2009

LJ is getting a bit too depressing for my liking.

So I'm back here :D I like having 2 blogs, it's kinda fun just switching from one to another whenever I feel like it. I don't know if it's true, but I feel like each blog is read by 2 different groups of 'audiences'. And that's why I feel different when I use each blog.

I wish I didn't have to grow up. Smile and make merry forever! (: But alas, my genetic make-up does not allow me so. I'm growing up - and too quick for my liking too.

I miss my family a lot. Last night in an email from my mum, she said something that made me laugh:

Yesterday, I told Biba on facebook that you kids have to take very good care of yourselves both physically and emotionally, and that is the best gift you guys can give to Mummy and Daddy. She immediately reply and said that parents have to take good care of themselves and that is the best gifts to their sons and daughters. So sharp tongue babe. It reminded me of an incidence long long time ago. I think she was only a few years old. One day she was with daddy and has hurt herself by knocking on something and cried. Daddy said See you are naughty so God punished you. She immediately replied and said that no, God punished you because you get heart pain that I was hurt. So sharp tongue and funny Bi.

I was innocent then. Haha. After I read this, an image just came to me, of the innocence of kids and how parents are really the greatest. They sacrifice so much for their children - a miniature of themselves, I like to think - and show their love in so many ways.

I miss my parents, I think they're the best (:

02:44
cowpat.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor.
Illusions never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn.

some songs just get stuck in your head.

Tetris can be rather therapeutic. If only it didn't come with the side effect of making your brain wander and imagine tetris scenarios at every possible moment.

Well, it's March now.
February brought along a lot of bad news. 4 in the span of 2 weeks I think? Cheeko was sharing with me the other night, about how she was thinking that actually these are all good news, that God's love is so great, He's calling them back; but then we just can't bring ourselves to be happy, we take it as bad news because we just can't fully understand how great His love is for us.

But ultimately, I guess there's lamenting for the loss of a loved one because down here, it is hard to completely thrive on God's love alone. Maybe we feel His love through the love of others? It does feel that way to me.

Those two weeks have definitely made me reflect a lot and I have a whole new perception on fear of death right now. But maybe I'll touch on that another day.

Let's hope March brings a whole lot of better feelings and motivational moments. Hopefully there'll be a turn of events, let's see how this Friday goes.

Stay strong, my friends. (:

Nothing hurts me more than to see you sad.

02:23
cowpat.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
i have so many siblings

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
i have my real sister & brother

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
you my crazy little sister

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
and a happy sister who is my friend who is a guy

Spudnik: Takes the cake says:
hahahahah yes

Spudnik: Takes the cake says:
and then you have your second daddy

Spudnik: Takes the cake says:
you got one mama also right

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
haha momma

cowpat. hey there, how're you doing? says:
yeah

Spudnik: Takes the cake says:
you so two-timing lor

12:06
cowpat.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

squash with milu was a good reliever. (:

Sigh. I don't know what to do anymore.

19:51
cowpat.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Update! haha. HELLO! This post is for you, BEST FRIEND!!! (:
(Since you keep asking me to update. haha)

You and your waxed-looking unwaxed hair. haha
(:

More happy days to come k!

21:41
cowpat.

Monday, January 05, 2009

HELLO HELLO HELLO! (:

I made a decision today and I'm going to stick to it.

And alas, I am back to my THINK POSITIVE blog! :D
I'm going to need to be doing a lot of that now.

Smile, everyone! (: (:

15:52
cowpat.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Sirin! Check this out.

At 3.24 am this morning,
The snow's coming down, I'm watchin' it fall. Lotsa people around, baby please come home! is inviting you to start viewing webcam. Do you want to Accept (Alt+C) or Decline (Alt+D) the invitation?

About 18 mins later, it came to this.

Hello shades-donning, santa-wannabe ZP!

btw, his singlet's broken on the right shoulder. haha.

hi zipeng.

OK HELLO EVERYONE ELSE (:
I just started my writing internship today.

Hmm.

01:55
cowpat.

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

http://www.crystallise-me.blogspot.com/

GO!

01:17
cowpat.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Don't you just hate it when you look forward to something so much that you enthusiastically await it, and you just keep on waiting but it never seems to come?

It's on your mind almost the whole day and when you finally get to check whether it has come, you're hit by disappointment that it's not there. But then after a brief moment, the hope comes rushing back - "maybe tomorrow!" your head says - and it stays on your mind until tomorrow, when the exact same moment from yesterday occurs again. Repeat process.
And you continue waiting, but gradually, the eagerness slips out of you, bit by bit. Before you know it, you're just thinking "oh, not today huh? alright let's see if it comes tomorrow then."

It gets annoying. You think - why are they doing this to me? Couldn't they just get it in quicker? Why make me wait foolishly, over-excitedly, for something that just isn't going to come anytime soon?

But then, on one of those many bleak days after a long wait, where you're down to the routine check with barely any hope due to the countless previous disappointments, you see it. There it is - finally. And suddenly, the whole surge of excitement comes flooding back in! The zeal you felt at the very beginning, waiting anxiously for this moment. I all comes rushing back to you and you feel great. Satisfied.

When we seem to have lost all hope, the spot is actually still there. It never goes away. It just likes to hide in a corner sometimes, waiting to be found.

And there you go.

00:18
cowpat.